She and Me and We

She’s so mobile now. She walks, she runs, she runs yelling with her hands up, she forgets that she doesn’t run well, she learns more about gravity, she plays outside with other kids. She feeds herself, she sort of drinks from a cup, she grabs my top and tries to yank it down in public, she settles for leaving her hand down my shirt.

She’s so busy. Everything in this drawer must be scattered on the floor, this cup and those keys must go in this box, Lena herself needs to get in a box, then pack her keys and phone and cow into a little barn, grab her jacket and try to open the door. Or maybe run for the stairs. The dog needs hugs, the cat needs whacked, maybe the baddy cat needs hugs, too. Dolly needs hugs, Papa needs found, Mama needs to pick Lena up now. For Bugs Hugs.

We have our own version of Pavlov’s dog: just shake the puffs container, crinkle a mum-mum wrapper, wave around a buddy fruit packet, look toward the chocolate-black bean brownies, or open cheese. Angus and Lena will be waiting when you break out the cheese.

We call her Lenabug, Lena-bean, Squirrely Girlie, Fussit, So Cutie!, Fuzzy Head, Snuggles, Kicky Legs, Bounce It!, Baby No Sleeps, BabyScreams, Stunt Baby. She says “bye!” and “Hi!” and “Mama” and “Cat”. And picklepicklepickle daguydaguydaguy, and makes up all kinds of songs.

She needs a few minutes to chill out after getting in the car after school, took me a little while to recognize it.

After a year, minus a day, I started leaving the mechanical suctioning device at home. Lena’s nearly ready for it (from the contents of her bottles), and I’m totally ready for it. She’s not ready to give up the bottle itself, though. Or breakfast or dessert. I’m ok with the last two. 

I have an idea of doing a duathalon in August, but I’m not sure where time to train will fit in. I have an idea of taking classes online, but I’m not sure where the time to study will appear. I have an idea of taking the vanpool to work, which would assist with both of those things, but I’m not sure if I can get up and ready to see other people by 7am. I got a sacroilial belt and I can play soccer without frequent breaks again. 

We got a new front door, letting more light into the house brightens up everything. We shoveled out the basement and laundry room and we have so much more space. The basement isn’t as dark or depressing or as overwhelming as it used to be. We have a plan to convert TCB’s armoire (that had previously been the tv cabinet) into a sewing cabinet. We haven’t picked a color for the new door yet, but are thinking about a dusty purple. 

I haven’t felt like writing, I have been having a hard time thinking of things to write about. But I don’t want to miss out on writing things down. 

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2 thoughts on “She and Me and We

  1. Since I can’t be there, I so enjoy readying anything you have to write of life, particularly life with Lena. Love the multitude of names for her.

  2. I love reading your blog. I can actually visualize what you talk about. Love Lena names!! Love all if you!!

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